According to this lady, her mother-in-law paid the kindness she showed her with evil deeds and in conclusion, stated that she has come to the realisation that this is the main reason why many ladies prefer men who have their mothers not existing.
This lady confided in the popular Nigerian relationship coach, Joro Olumofin to share her ordeal.
The story reads;
Why some girls prefer to marry men with no mother
I’m going to be like everyone else and say hide my identity as if you will reveal my identity otherwise lol.
My story is pretty long but I will try to cut it short.
I met my hubby 4 years ago and he proposed after a few months of dating. Now his mother is not with his dad, she left when he was 2 due to domestic violence issues (or so I was told, even though later I found out from hubby’s elder brother’s wife that she scalded someone with hot water and the case even went to court) she remarried and even had 3 other children. Because of the remarried and even had 3 other children.
Because of the resentment of her abandoning them hubby did not have a relationship with her so I begged him before the marriage to resume communication with her because in my head I could use a second mum and it wasn’t her fault she couldn’t stay with her children ( as per women supporting women mumu wey I be)
On my account he started talking to her and even sending her money. Our trad he sent her transportation as in to hire bus and come with her family, money for clothes etc she didn’t show up. He was so pissed that day that I had to placate him he told me ” I told you I don’t trust that woman, she’s very manipulative” I said no worry because I was feeling that their father put
no worry because I was feeling that their father put hatred for the woman inside them. She showed up for the white but he was still very dismissive of her. I felt sorry for her so I asked my sisters and bridesmaids to make sure she and her guests are well taken care of. They gave her sourvenier from every single one at the venue, gave her coolers of food to go home with etc.
After wedding I was talking to her over the phone ormal, to the extent that when my husband does wron,; I will report to her and she will say what??? She will call him now and correct the matter. She is a member of a strong bible believing church so she will call and be praying for us occasionally, I felt I hit the jackpot in the mother in law department.
I got pregnant shortly after marriage and we were deciding on who will come for omugwo, I know my mum still works and she has 2 ‘ittls children she adopted plus
still works and she has 2 little children she adopted plus my dad at home to take care of so she can’t stay long with us, I asked hubby to tell his mother to start preparing to come and his words were “over my dead body will I let that woman in my home Or near my child” I was like what is wrong with you? She left your father doesn’t make her a bad person… He said let your mum stay as long as she can stay and we will continue from there, we would watch YouTube videos to learn how to take care of the baby lol. After much begging I gave up. I gave birth and my mum came around for 3 weeks that is when I started seeing what my hubby has been saying.
When my mum was doing omugwo my father in law will be calling her continuously, thanking her for coming because he knows that by tradition it is my mother in law that should be there doing the work. My mother in law never called one day to thank my mum, maybe
law that should be there doing the work. My mother in law never called one day to thank my mum, maybe because she felt that she’s the one that’s supposed to be enjoying the priveledge. That passed and a few months later I and hubby had an argument about him not wearing his wedding ring and next thing I heard was a loud bang, my husband slapped me. I just got up from the floor gathered my things, Plrried my baby and left to my sister’s house.
In that regard I love my parents so much, my dad called me that whatever I want to do he supports me Because ” I did not give birth to any child that one man will maltreat” I said I’m leaving because if he can slap me he can beat me. My MIL called me and she was asking why I left the house does it mean my father has never beat my mother before? In my head I’m like Jesus, shouldn’t this woman be sympathetic to the situation being a domestic
mother before? In my head I’m like Jesus, shouldn’t this woman be sympathetic to the situation being a domestic violence victim herself? I just answered her no. She said how will I fend for myself seeing as I have no job, I asked how have I been fending for myself before… I just answered her anyhow.
Few months later my husband started begging, traveled to come see me and his child and was begging profusely. Then he told me that shortly before the apping incident, we had an issue which he spoke to His mum about and she told him that in one week he will see what God will do….5 days later came the slap. He said she called him recently to say she has good news and when asked what news she said God revealed to her that I’m not his wife!!! After marriage and a child? He also told me that she objected to him marrying me for no reason, in that case I was angry because he never told me. I also found out that all the while I was reporting him to her and she was saying she will call him.
to me. a so oun out t a a e w i e was reporting him to her and she was saying she will call him to order, she was calling him to further drive a wedge between us so marriage will scatter. I even learnt that the case of hot water scalding that went to court she used diabolic means to scatter the case, that one is gist from my sister inlaw and I can’t verify the authenticity anyway.
We resolved our differences and I went back to the house after promising me that violence will never happen again ( 3 years now and nothing like that ever happened again).
Something happened with one of her children the next year and she wanted to come to our house to visit her other children in the same city but hubby wouldn’t allow her into the house. It was paining me because the woman will be feeling like I’m the instigator but no. Next thing she called me and said her God told her my own is too much, Omo I just blocked her and deleted her number . I got tired of this her god that never tells her good things. Cant her god direct her to reveal to her son where he can make 10 million in one day? Hubby stopped taking her calls but sends her money occasionally.
Her brothers and sisters will be calling to appeal to my hubby to call her but he won’t agree ( He kuku get coconut head) even when she was sick and hospitalized, he sent money but never called.) noticed that anytime any of them calls I and hubby must quarrel about something stupid, one time it was about donut… I just tire for the matter.
tire for the matter.
Recently we had issues and we were resolving it and things were getting back to normal, next thing he told me he called his mother on Christmas day and made peace with her. Since that day na so so problem we dey get. He will be recalling things that happened before we got married and arguing about them. Brought up issue of when we married I had no job… me that has 3 different businesses going now that I built from scratch and that are thriving, last time he was in a jam I rescued him financially. Sometimes we feed on what I make. One month I even made twice his monthly income and he was surprised.
My worry now is this, I can’t fight this battle with this woman. I’m mad at my hubby for not telling me she disproved of our union thereby denying me the opportunity to opt out. I can’t fight physically or spiritually either way I will lose Because I’m not strong either way. The day of the slap incident we were supposed to see a strong prophet the next day to seek solutions to our financial, marital etc problems, that never happened.
I can’t believe that I have tried to be nice to this woman every step of the way and she has been like a rat that eats your feet and blows you breeze while asleep so you won’t feel it at first. I don’t know what to do. I secretly used to send her money in the past because I felt bad for how they (her children from her first marriage) were treating her. Even to the point of sending money to her children from her second marriage. Now my husband said yesterday that her prayer is what he needs in life rinht nnw like helIn?what pravers?
I can’t believe that I have tried to be nice to this woman every step of the way and she has been like a rat that eats your feet and blows you breeze while asleep so you won’t feel it at first. I don’t know what to do. I secretly used to send her money in the past because I felt bad for how they (her children from her first marriage) were treating her. Even to the point of sending money to her children from her second marriage. Now my husband said yesterday that her prayer is what he needs in life right now, like hello?what prayers?
After this long story what am I saying? I understand with girls who don’t want mother in law because no matter how good you are to some of them they will still pay you back with evil